i had such a sore throat this morning—it was difficult and painful to swallow, and i thought, “what if i still had my tonsils?  what would that be like?  would i be unable to swallow at all?  And, if that were the case, would i end up drooling and spitting an unlimited amount of

     it’s brute force plain and simple and it works because it’s brute force   Ursula said.  but there had to be some way to settle the invasion of Mars peacefully—at least that’s what i think Ursula was talking about.  once upon a time there were Martians that were really smart even if they were Chinese  

     did i tell you that Ursula comes from another planet?  i think there’s a planet out toward Proxima Centauri—maybe she lives there!  But, technically, she could live almost anywhere!  I don’t know what planet she’s from, but i know that she loves to talk to me.  but how?  might you ask? we just “tune”

1      code red: when you start wondering if you’re a persona or a real person, then it’s safe to say you crossed a line.  most people including me can’t tell the difference—and maybe we shouldn’t be able to.  What is the difference?  Shall we say that you’re a comedian, and you make fun of

     Ok—now, i imagine Anna Karenina is really pissed, because i saw her whole figure on tv and she didn’t look overweight at all.  I happen to be really confused, and that confusion is what makes Anna Karenina so angry.  I should just mind my own business, right?  But why did i write what i

13      All this time i thought i was doing something that would help get Anna Karenina elected president, but i got hit with a reality check when it occurred to me that my thoughts on telepathic communications combined with my obsession with a person I never met could lead Anna Karenina and others to

     Are you okay?  here i was, at the grocery story, buying loads of cream of mushroom soup and other canned goods and using it to fill up the closets so that i might somehow put a stop to this idea of junk accumulating and holding me hostage—as if i had a career that would’ve

     she knew what was going to happen, and she didn’t care   now we were talking about the supreme court, and the fact that Ruth Ginsburg left the court when a republican was in office—meaning that a republican judge was going to end up taking her place.  we were lamenting our fortunes just a bit—because

     Ah, yes, Anna Karenina was a little hurt, i could tell.  i could try a little harder, in the future, but i couldn’t undo what had been done; on the other hand, she thought i was cute—when, that is, i wasn’t constantly putting her down or saying that she hugged somebody too long.  i

    Now, I was in DC for a few days for my brother’s surprise birthday party: therefore there was like a one in ten billion chance of running into Anna Karenina as opposed to a one in ten trillion chance or something like that—furthermore, if i chanced upon Anna Karenina, I’d run and around the